Monica is a speaker.

I was asked to be a speaker at Fro Fashion Week in Atlanta. As regular readers know I am an advocate of thrifty hair care. I will be staging a "Product Intervention" for product junkies. I won't give away all my tips here but you only NEED about five essential products.

I look forward to seeing you ladies there.

There is a Black Friday Sale on tickets. The 1st 20 people will receive 50% off! After the first 20 tickets are sold registration is 30% off for the remainder of the day! Sale starts 12 midnight to 11:59 on Friday 11/26.

Childrens Hair Care - Part 2

Moms that want this look want this look for their daughters.

I wrote previously about parents poor hair care on their children. I believe this begin with the parent ( especially the mother). If a mother suffers from hair delusion what can she offer her daughter. Hair delusions include but are not limited to the belief that all length is good, any hair that looks good is good regardless of health, straight/loosely curled hair is superior to kinky/tightly curled hair, hair texture can prevent growth and oils moisturize.

The mothers seem oblivious to the fact that the heads of hair they covet are those of celebrities. A celebrity's appearance is part of their job, they have a TEAM devoted just to caring for and styling their hair. I don't expect my hair to look like that of natural celebrities for that reason. I don't have a team of stylist. If you don't have a team why should you look like them, relaxer or not.

I believe these women place this same pressure on their child, expecting them to look like the children on the relaxer boxes. The child doesn't have a team and in most cases not even a well informed parent. They bear your disappointment through demeaning words or caustic chemicals.

If you teach these delusions to your child in addition to the messages she gets from the larger society what will she think? I have seen the results. She is a four-year -old who teases another four-year-old because her shrunken natural hair doesn't show length or swing and flow. She will call her peer "bald-headed" and "ugly". She will ask with all the malice a child can muster, "Who did your hair?". She will learn she is not perfect the way she was born and will want to let her peers know too.

Childrens Hair Care - Part 1

I have been making some very pointed statements in chats recently in regards to childrens hair care. A couple of people misunderstood my stance, I should begin by saying I am a teacher. I have spent years viewing many tiny heads of hair. Teachers like social workers and doctors sometimes see the worst of what society has to offer.

I have seen many happy, healthy heads of hair atop well-adjusted minds. I believe that this is a result of their upbringing, the example set by their mother, the language used in reference to them and their hair.

I have also seen the opposite:

-bald/thinning hair in girls under 5
-weave/braids attached to bald/thinning hair
-hair broken off to TWA length at age 4
-all manner of negative comments made within ear shot of the child (her hair is just so nappy..)
-comparison made to other children hair in front of child ( I wish she had hair like that girls.)
-relaxing hair as soon as possible after scalp trauma ( like rash or skin infection)
-hair pulled with extreme tension
-extreme dryness
-relaxed children insulting natural children
-long hair children insulting short hair children

I know some of this is done in ignorance and some in neglect but it doesn't make me ( or the child) feel any better. So if you catch me on a chat sounding a little preach-y about caring for children's hair please remember I probably saw some ignorant perversion of hair care that week.

Lil Better Butter Product Review

Natural Review by L was kind enough to review our product. She bought it with her own money although I would have happily sent it to her for free. The review is here.